2017 review (UDAH TELAT BIARIN)

Just like what other bloggers write (probably) or what i commonly wrote in this period of time, that is

"Wow it's been a long time i don't write here, okay i need to apologize my self and start making resolution to write more and more and routinely. New year obviously new me."

Haha! Who's in here can relate? It's a very unproductive way to start making changes tho. Let's say that if you kept doing it in the beginning (beningging- ben - beningging) of the year, just leave that instant and seems to be intentionless habits. 

But obviously we can take this moment of new year as a moment to review, stop for a while to make a moment of throwback, to see our stepping stone, to re-learn and remember what lessons can be taken from our last 365 days of living.

I don't agree to say that this is the only moment for you to resolute and review yourself, but sometimes we just want to wake up or do something when clock shows us the multiple 5's. Haha!

As i start to prepared for ending the 2017 with quite spontaneous small barbeque partay with my family, i realized that this ending has to mean something for me. Frankly, i feel like that day was just as the same the other day where i literally still spent my afternoon sleeping with no excitement for new year's eve just like other people. But then, i knew this has to be the moment for me to retrospect mistakes and lessons. 

So, shall we look back? (Don't be that paranoid)

1. MUN

This is the most remembered experienced i guess, because i got the chance to join 2 MUNs in last year. But, with full regret i must say that i didn't put much effort on both of it. Which is a shame. I wasn't proud, because i knew i could do better than that time. Obviously, lack of preparation and yes literature.

My first MUN was in UII MUN (Universitas Islam Indonesia) it was nice. I was so proud (and still am) with Putra, the undescribeable man. He managed to get through it so well until he got the 'Honorable Mention' award. I still questioned how did he do it, but he's totally an inspiration

Second MUN was in JOINMUN (Jogja International MUN), yes ladies and gentlemen International. I thought at first, well obviously this is going to be harder and more challenging, but i always said to myself  "Girl make challenges as your breakfast and eat it." Until, the day has come. It didn't terrified me that much tho, even though i often got almost late for the conferences or even the first day, cause jogja's traffic is sucks (and i don't see government's action towards it which is a shame i hate it). I met great people and new friends that most of them are so humble and friendly. Until the conferences started..... i wasn't that terrified. Not as terrifying as what i imagined. But yes, the confusion mechanism and solution delivered by each delegates makes me wanna stop and googled it during the conferences. Yes, another lack of preparation.

From these experiences i found out that i'm able to conquered my fears and learn to just take the chance, because any possibilities might happen. You just gotta have to face it with your best effort, put every effort into it, don't even think of tantalizing target that you'll get the award, just do your best. How do people say it? Nothing to lose?

Right, Nothing to Lose 

2. Love Thingy

If you happen to be my closest friend, then you might know the issue i had been through. Yes, my relationship was shipwrecked. Surprisingly, i was able to managed my feelings quite well at first. But, then probably i've gone too far until i was being numb. There went by dilemmas and confusion on which side should i be in. Because obviously, hanging on to something that was also reckless and lame wasn't supposed to be an option, you gotta have to stand by yourself right?

But, one thing that i just knew from myself was that, i am not that desperate when someone else left me. I was able to find the strength i have within myself and i obviously used it. AND I'M PROUD! Although like what i said, it was only a the first week or month. So, yeah. But still, i'm stronger than i thought. (don't be mad, Putra) but, yes i've been through two times or more of heartbreak, and i wasn't that lame. That's quite an achievement. I mean, sometimes you really need to differentiate between personal and professional right?

so, Stay Strong when you actually can. Be Strong when you think you can't 

HAHAHAHA! Again, i forgot to continue this posts like a month ago? I should probably apologize to myself.

Right, bye

i race my case